nice guys finish last (draft 1)

** This post have been edited a little bit

it hurts... and before we proceed further, I just want to go on record.. I'm not saying I'm a nice guy.. no one is super nice these days... I'm no different...

I'm sure most us have heard the phrase "Nice guys finish last"... so what does that means??... is it telling us being nice will never get us far... at least when it comes to ladies... as i often heard this phrase uttered in the event of a nice dude lost a girl to a jerk... and why is that?? I know in high school most jerks gets away with the girls... while nice guys are left with nothing much... teenage girls always more attracted to the bad boys persona... we could see this in almost every high school... but after high school is done I thought it would all change for the better for us nice guys...

Well people may argue that it has change... and for the most part I agree... but I have never seen a jerk dating average girls... they always managed to get the hot girl... what is it about jerks/bad boys with hot chicks??... you know what...  I give up... I know I'm not a super duper nice guy... there are things that I've done in the past that I'm not particularly super proud of... but I'm not naive... girls always go to nice guys to complaint about their jerk boyfriends, to accompany them to do their shopping (which takes hours and hours of walking and standing) and as a plan B when they are mid 30s and not married yet... I mean, come on... we, nice guys always listen to every word they say and response in an appropriate manners... we look them in the eyes instead of their chest when we talked to them... open doors for them and being super attentive but still being considered as "just friend"... and please, I'm sick and tired of "oh you're too good for me"... no one is that good... nice guys would have push the pause button on the game console in the middle of an all time high scoring game just to answer the phone and listen to girls nagging and complaining about their boyfriends... I don't get it...

Sure, most guys who are interested in a girl would do all that... I'm fine with that... but what gets me the most is those jerks or players who despite being notorious for being what they are still managed to score... I mean, are you deaf and blind ? cant you see past the bad boy aura or the good looks? this maybe be a stupid rant... but I feel for all the nice guys... I have googled the phrase all too many times and from those reading, I'm still at a lost... all the article said that things will get better... but I'm sick of waiting... at 30, good things should have happened to me already... hahaha.. oh well maybe I'm not that nice and I'm not that bad.. I'm stuck in the middle.. a grey area where girl just don't come around that much... well that just sucks... you cant take the middle ground... either be super bad ass or be super nice... and the lesser of 2 evil always ended up being heart broken (trust me , it's not the best feeling in the world. I rather take a punch in the face)... trying to balance the nice guy attitude with a little of those much sought after bad boy persona don't really for some reason unknown to me...

We are becoming obsolete, we are playing by the rules in a game that clearly favor the cheaters... life sucks and the world is unfair... "the world is an ugly place but you're so beautiful to me..."

I'm sure the world doesn't work that way... there must be a reason that science hasn't found yet... i need to do more reading... i need to be more observant and critical in my fact finding missions... and i wrote this piece of half baked post because I'm crushed, broken, blown to smithereens and utterly disappointed with what i have experience recently... so sue me for being one sided, bitter and an awesome jerk... I'm choked with grief, my heart is shattered... at this very moment my heart is the world's worse kind of weapon (this is actually a song title... "my heart is the worse kind of weapon" by the fallout boys.. awesome song by the way)

well I guess that's it for now.. until i can get more information and when I'm over this disappointment (tak tau biler la tu ekk) i will revisit this phrase and try my best to write a balance perspective..

"I really like you but I can't be the Invisible Man, I'm tired of being the shoulder, I want to be another body part, I want to use up a woman so she's ruined for all other men ... "

This place is dead and devoid of all things fun

This place is dead and devoid of emotions

... and yet i found myself here again... waiting for the time to pass me by... crawling ever so slowly... greeting these unsmiling faces... forever locking horns in a battle... between freedom and the need to adhere to society cruel  judging piercing eyes... this place is dead... this place is mad... this is where i make a living... tending to computers... not my ideal career but hey... someone gotta pay the bills... and frankly, i envied my friends who do what the really like and make it as a living (and that is you acid... you and that artsy aura of yours... and congrats on your solo exhibition... I'll bring my sorry ass over to bangsar this weekend)... 

The place is dead and devoid of emotions... all we have is drones in cubicles... mindless shell living on SLAs, KPIs and warning alerts beeping from computer screens... I'm dead and devoid of all emotions... for I'm a drone living in a hive mind :)

Relationships between attractive women and ordinary men 'more likely to fail' (oh crap!!!)

Oh crap crap crap!!! (what a fugly looking men like me have to do hahaha) 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/relationships/8353975/Relationships-between-attractive-women-and-ordinary-men-more-likely-to-fail.html

Relationships in which the woman is more attractive than the man are more likely to fail, according to research. 

Scientists from Stirling, Chester and Liverpool universities found that beautiful women seem to realise they can pick and choose their mates, whereas an attractive man with a more ordinary woman seemed to be more content and less likely to stray.

The findings might come as scant consolation to Bernie Ecclestone, whose marriage to the model Slavica Ecclestone, ended in 2009. She is almost a foot taller than him and 28 years younger.

Researchers took photographs of men and women in over 100 couples, some of whom had been together for a few months, others for many years, and they were then rated on looks.

The analysis showed that in relationships pairing a "beauty" with an average man, it tended to last only a matter of months. Rob Burriss, one of the researchers, said: "This would indicate it is the woman who is in control of whether the relationship continues."

He added that beautiful women may realise they can afford to pick and choose. Conversely, the less attractive women "may have to make do with what they have, hence the longer relationships", he said. Dr Burriss said the idea echoes the Dr Hook song When You're In Love With A Beautiful Woman, which warns a man outshone by his woman that "everybody wants to take your baby home", as the Daily Mail noted.

The work was published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. 

Withdrawal symptoms

In denial of reality
the world where the truth hurts
but the pain feels good somehow
for some odd reasons
that is beyond comprehension

That sinking feeling
The stomach is churning
The prescription is burning
the magic of the throbbing wound
my yearning knows no bound

I know I should not linger
desperation to pacify my hunger
She's my pain and also my cure
and though my intention was pure
She's the wild rose that i cant secure

where's my ability to differentiate
rejection and affection
mutilation of my acumen
An infatuation gone wrong
A mutiny against reality
bordering stupidity

A relic broken to smithereens
A heavy hearted attempt of salvation
am i beyond redemption?

maybe next time
well, there will be no next time
I'm not going into a relapse
Even if the pain is good

Torres got too big for his boots, not too big for Liverpool

I wont say that I'm not disappointed to lose Torres to another team... and i wont be burning his replica jersey too (because i don't have one and because he did give us Liverpool fan a fantastic time while he was here).... But i think this article explained much of what i feel/think happened to him in the last 12 month he was here in Liverpool.

http://www.mirrorfootball.co.uk/opinion/columnists/david-maddock/David-Maddock-says-Chelsea-s-Fernando-Torres-got-too-big-for-his-boots-not-too-big-for-Liverpool-article693383.html
 

After all the debate, all the hand-wringing and all the incredible conspiracy theories surrounding the departure of Fernando Torres from Liverpool, one very good reason for the sale stands out.

The striker, undoubtedly the best in the world two years ago, seemed to let that status go to his head to the extent that he believed he was bigger than one of the most famous clubs in the world.

This is not a character assassination of Torres, and there is a certain sympathy for his situation in reaching the peak years of his career at a club in transition.

But last week, and indeed all this season and for much of the last one, there was a lingering suspicion the Spanish international had lost the grounded perspective that made him such a breath of fresh air when he arrived at Anfield.

One moment, soon after he became Liverpool’s record signing, sticks in my memory.

Approached by the media in the mixed zone of a Champions League game, he politely and carefully explained, in his best English, that he would prefer to wait to speak until his grasp of the language was better.

What stood out at that time was a clear lack of arrogance. He was – in the words of then-manager Rafa Benitez – a "nice boy, from a nice family".

There was no arrogance, no elevated sense of importance, indeed almost a shyness about him, and real politeness. He seemed able to identify with the fans, and understand the tie between terrace and turf.

That disappeared over time, to the extent that over the past year or so, when approached by the media, he wouldn’t even deign to speak while rejecting their requests, instead merely issuing a look of contempt that showed just how beneath him the idea was.

In essence, that contempt is aimed at the fans, who deserve more than dismissive refusals to talk, or the sanitised sound bites they are patronisingly thrown by players and clubs these days.

With his 27th birthday approaching, Torres believes the next three years will be the peak of his career, and he clearly believed that those three years would be spent in transition at Anfield.

But his attitude over the last 18 months and his body language on the pitch during that time seems to suggest he also believes he has a divine right to honours… whether he contributes or not.

He seemed to have forgotten that Liverpool paid him handsomely to play at one of the world’s most historic clubs, a salary, in fact, in excess of £6million a year. That money ultimately, comes from the fans who buy the tickets, merchandising and TV packages which pay for those wages.

It is my belief that Torres lost the link with the fans he understood when he arrived at Anfield.

He became so distant from them, so detached from their experience, that he lost sight of what it means to play for a big club, whether they are competitive or not.

That is why his body language was so poor on the pitch this season, and why he seemed to perform in only a handful of game.

He no longer understood how much of an insult such an attitude would be to those fans who idolised him.

For a guy earning in excess of £120,000 a week, that was not acceptable, and if that sort of money and the devotion of the fans wasn’t enough for him to perform at his peak every week, then it wasn’t just the right decision to sell him, but the only decision Liverpool could make.

Kenny Dalglish suggested as much last week, when he said he was concentrating on players who wanted to play for the club. And there are many who still want to do that.

Realistically, Liverpool will take several years under their new owners to get back to the very top again, after the problems under the previous regime. But they are still a massive club, with a massive name… and a massive pull, as the signing of Luis Suarez and Andy Carroll, two of the most promising young strikers in the world, proved.

They are bigger than the short-term pursuit of trophies, and big enough to make their best players amongst the highest paid in the world.

But if you lose sight of the link with the supporters who make football what it is, then nothing is big enough, and it is time to go.

Thank you for the memories... I hope you will be able to go back to athletico madrid and win something...