Are you sleepwalking?

The meet up with my colleague from my first real job when pretty well... there were much to talked about... many things have changed... 2 of them is married now... the rest of us are still looking for the spark... doubt the search will end soon.. but that's ok... it will end when you least expect it... or so they said lah... the food were delicious too... but i cant even finished mine... were more interested in the stories than the meal... should have a salad instead lah.. there goes my diet hahahaha...

On another note...
It takes a lot more than what i could offer... or at least that's the way i see it lah... i know i should be less pessimistic... because i said i wanted to improve... but some time you have call a spade a spade... it is not being pessimistic.. but it is being realistic... yeah sure, i do hope i am wrong... now that is being optimistic... something new, i learn to associate with myself with... provided me with a different point of view on things... haha... better late than never...

If it wasn't meant to be... try as hard as you may.. it wouldn't make a different... i will put my effort into it... i need to... the rest is out of my hands... the journey is long... it'll probably takes longer to click than i anticipated... we'll see... the journey is long... whatever the finsih line brings... it's the journey that count for most... the prize is juat a reward for the effort... so here i am trying... so here i am not giving up... so here i am... taking baby steps... so here i am making sure i'm not falling into the pessimism trap i laid for myself...

thank you for kind words...

Adik aku...

My sister got engaged yesterday... what a relieve.. and good luck to her husband to be... i love my sister to bits... and i only got 1 sibling.. but man, she is one very difficult person to handle.. she do things as she please without a care in the world...

But for all the fights/argument we gotten ourselves into.. we do still love each other.. ye lah adik beradik... marah pun tak lama.. kejap jer dah ok...

I will have to save some money to buy her a great wedding present... tak tau la aper nak bagi...
ideas are appreciated...

muke takde iras iras pun... aper la.. kater adik beradik... chait...

one moment in time

at a time when nothing worries us :D

This was a long time ago... at a time when life is all about having fun, breaking rules and chasing girls... seems like it was eon ago that we took this picture... a little information about this picture are:-

1. It was the first ever picture to be taken in our dormitory.
2. It was @ dusk... we were getting ready for our dinner and prayers.

We looked so much different today... time has eaten our youth and much of our love for breaking/bending the rules... hahaha.. things we did and the consequences that we faced... sometimes I wonder how the heck did we make it out alive from there... it is definitely one of the highlights of my life... thank you guys for the fun, the laugh and the tears... wouldn't change any of it for the world....

Top row:- Cat, Ezry, tapa, fakar, amat, me and zaiyad
Standing:- Lan, Ismie, Cha' ah, Apis, K.R.
seating:- End, raja, mat naien, feek, Omar

there still a few of us that were not in this picture...

mungkin gagal itu satu kurniaan

Mungkin lah.. sebab aku sendiri pun tak sure aper yang positif tentang kegagalan nie... and this is coming from someone yg sangat sinonim dengan kegagalan... aku selalu gagal that failure should be my middle name... haha... okalh enough on this negativity .. nanti orang igat gua emo plak... ade la sket tapi tak kronik sehingga memerlukan khidmat nasihat dari pakar perunding peribadi (kawan kawan la maksudnyer tu)... huhu

pagi tadi aku bangun kire awal la jugak... still lewat dari sepatutnyer but awal dari rutin... mata mmg mengantuk la.. tak cukup tido .. layan movie sampai kol 2 pagi.. ampeh... tapi kena la bangun... semangat sket sebab petang ni patut gi jogging kat tepi tasik (hint hint... peluang utk tgk anak dara keje kerajaan jogging skali) kat putrajaya.. tasik maner satu aku pun tak tau... aku lost la area putrajaya nie.. tapi kawan aku ajak jugak ... redah ajer la... sambil enjoy pemandangan (and awek) dapat gak menyihatkan tubuh badan yang telah sedia tak sihat nie... hehehehe...

the drive to work today cam ok plak... takde la traffic jam sangat.. sket2 ajer... sambil memekak menyanyi lagu 21 guns yang aku dok repeat sampai tahap aku hafal lirik dier... aku pun drive la dengan kadar segera untuk sampai opis.. ingat kalo sampai awal ade la parking dekat ngan opis.. hari cam takde mood plak nak jalan kaki... tapi sampai ajer mobil aku kat opis... ampeh parking full... shift malam nie tak reti balik umah ker??? damn.. so aku pegi la parking kat terminal.. jauh sket tapi takpe ... macam aku cakap kat entry sebelum nie.. aku ske sket jalan dari terminal nie... macam mendung ajer... dah le pernah orang jumpe ular kat semak tepi jalan tu... mmg adventure la... tapi sebab hari cerah... takpe arr .. kalo hujan.. aku tunggu jugak sampai ade parking kat opis....

ok lah awal sangat aku update blog nie takde mende nak citer... just terbace artikel ttg gagal tadi so macam nak komen tapi idea takmo kuar.. pakse2 pun tak guna kalo dier takmo kuar... so biar je lah.. nanti ade idea aku edit la balik mende nie

have a nice day ahead dudes!!!!!!!!!!

the one with the melancholy effect

melancholy?.. what does it mean? I don't know or more accurately I don't know how to describe it... but I do feel like it a lot especially in the morning during the long drive to the office and in the evening during the long drive back home... why only during that time?.. again I have no answer for that... most likely it is because... that's the only alone time I have nowadays... a time to reflect back on things that have been said or done... so anyway this post is not about my stupid affection with the word melancholy... but it is about this :-

I reached the office around 8am this morning... but I can't find any parking space near the office so instead or paying for parking but I still have to walk a long way to the office I decided to park a free parking space.. the distance to the office is about the same as the paid ones... and I like the long walk from there.. I got a chance to pass by my old office... fuh sungguh nostalgic aku nie... mahcam sial.... So anyway... as soon as I emerge from the car, I saw this 2 chicks... 1 is not bad looking... kecik ajer orangnyer... hahaha... dan aku plak besar cam gajah.... I walked past the first chick then I heard someone calling my name... " Eh, Rai"... well not my name la.. but during my high school days... there was a tiem when all the girls at my school would call me Rai.. since Aboo is such a kampung name.. hehehe... so I have not being called rai for a very long time... so I turned my head and .. Wallaaaa... my ex... standing there looking as puzzle as I am... awkward silence sekejap since dua dua tak tau aper mau cakap... " kenal tak??" she asked... I nodded my head... of course I remembered her... sebab aku pun tak reti nak cakap aper... soalan rutin la keluar... "erm keje kat sini ker (cyberjaya)".... she said she is working at one of the telco company... I was dumbstruck sekejap... I never expected to see her here, where I work.. but anyway.. I wave my Employee ID tag to her and said " I work here".. she recognised the logo and smile... I wave my hand and continue my walk to the office... takmo ler aku borak lebih lebih plak... she's married (divorced by now I think.. I heard from some friend la)... plus it was a long time ago.. something should just stay in the past... but still ... what a surprise... takpe la.. at least now I know she's working somewhere near my office... hahaha no good can come from that... so there goes all my plan to flirt with the girls from the telco company... dammit!!!!... haha ok lah.. jumpe bekas kekasih... menjadikan aku melankoli sekejap dan over dramatic sekejap.. hahaha

oh and by the way semalam aku terjumpe ngan seorang pelakon yg di mata aku sangat la cun.. ok maybe tak la sangat cun but still cun sehingga teringin aku nak buat bini (eventhough the chances are like 1 in a 90 centrilion)... scha yahya.. yerp the girl from that lame Air Asia drama... lame or not .. aku tgk sebab dier n kengkawan dier dalam citer tu cun... hahaha.. I need to start watching movie and drama for the entertainment and acting value instead of how hot the actress is... I really do... ha anyway that was my Monday and Tuesday morning...